As a retired casualty claims manager, I first read this account way back when... I ran across it amongst some old papers and although it is, no doubt a fantasy and an exageration, I find it still puts a smile on my face:
My friend, in filing an accident claim with the insurance company, had written in Box 8 of the form for 'Cause of Accident:' "Trying to do the job alone." Dissatisfied with this explanation, the insurance company asked for fuller details of the accident; so my friend wrote the following:
"I am a bricklayer by trade. On the date of the accident I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I had completed my work I found that I had about 500 pounds of bricks left over. Rather than carry them by hand, I decided to lower the bricks in a barrel by using a pulley which was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor.
"Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding it tightly to assure a slow descent of the 500 pounds of bricks.
"You will note in Box 11 of the accident report that I weigh 135 pounds. Because of my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor I met the barrel coming down. That explains the fractured skull and broken collar bone.
"Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. By this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope in spite of my pain.
"At approximately this time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the bricks, the barrel then weighed approximately 50 pounds.
"I refer you again to my wight in Box 11. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor I again met the barrel, coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles and the lacerations to my legs and lower body area. This encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks; so fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked.
"I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay in pain on the bricks, unable to stand, I again lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope. The bottomless barrel, weighing more than the rope, came down on me and broke both my legs.
"As I lay under the barrel the trailing rope slapped me in the face, causing the lacerations under the left eye.
"I hope I have furnished the detailed information you requested."
The Accident Report
Published January 14, 1985
Friday, February 10, 2012
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